Mexican President Calls Perry Border Policy “Unneighborly”!

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 12 Sep 2014 | John Semmens 

Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto castigated Texas Governor Rick Perry’s deployment of National Guard troops on the U.S.-Mexican border as “unneighborly. He’s like that Clint Eastwood character in Gran Torino telling my people to get off his lawn.”
“For decades my people have become accustomed to the ability to pass freely between our two countries,” Peña said. “In our minds this clearly establishes an ‘easement’ right to travel over these roads and pathways. For Governor Perry to suddenly seek to terminate these rights is an affront.”
Peña indicated that he plans to bring the issue up before the United Nations. “America’s trampling of human rights has become a growing problem for us,” Peña complained. “While the United States may be the 800 lb. gorilla in our bilateral relationship they can’t stand against the whole of humanity represented by the UN.”
UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon promised “to give this matter serious consideration. The Earth belongs to all of humanity. The right of any individual to move about in any part of it cannot be denied by any secular power. The fact that Mexicans have been crossing the Texas border unopposed for generations would seem to have built a strong case for the easement right claimed by President Peña.”
Peña brushed off contentions that his country has also been unneighborly by continuing to imprison US Marine Sgt. Andrew Tahmooressi for inadvertently crossing into Mexico with guns in the trunk of his vehicle. “There is no right to bear arms in Mexico,” Peña pointed out. “If we let this man go it will set a bad example for others. His case is in no way comparable. First off, he is one man. The persons impacted by Governor Perry’s edict number in the tens, maybe hundreds of thousands. Few of them are armed, but even if they were, America’s Constitution guarantees their right to own and carry firearms.”